Bad Poetry: Joseph Gwyer

Joseph Gwyer, potato salesman and poet, was born in 1835 at Redlynch, near Downton, Wilts, England. When he was eight years old, his mother died, leaving behind eight children. Little Joseph was raised thereafter by his grandmother and uncles on a rather lonely farm nearby. At 17, he travelled to London, and was so taken by the big city that he stayed.

Much of Gwyer's poetry was occasioned by the doings of royalty. Prince Albert Victor, Duke of Clarence dies on January 14, 1892, and by the 17th of January, Gwyer has produced a memorial verse. His Royal Highness the Duke of York marries Her Serene Highness Princess and, boom! "The Royal Marriage" is penned. HRH and HSH have a baby, and "The Birth of the Future Heir to the Throne of Great Britain" promptly results.

Gwyer was a zealous Baptist and a tireless crusader for temperance. In this couplet from "Ode on the Visit of the Shah of Persia" he was able to combine two of his favorite topics:

Intoxicating draughts he never does drink
If this we copied should we not be better, think?