Astral Travel

Directly behind my house is a lovely park, separated from my property only by a tall cast iron fence and a screen of bushes and trees. The benches in the far corner of the park are a popular spot for the neighborhood gentlemen of leisure. The benches seem to afford a great deal of privacy, but in reality are only ten feet from my kitchen and office windows.

Late this afternoon, as I was doing a bit of yard work, I was treated to a particularly fascinating disquisition. Apparently someone was sitting on the bench, reading, but that seemingly harmless act was seen as provocation by another citizen. I can't resist paraphrasing some of the latter's words:

"Astral travel, man! Astral travel is where it's at. You're here, and the next minute you're someplace else. That's astral travel. Figure out how to do that, and you could be a millionaire. Even more than a millionaire.

"You're sitting there reading that book, but you don't know nothing. Just because it's in the book, you believe it. But that book is just words. Don't mean it's true.

"I'm an educated man. I got a AA degree in small business. I was going to get a degree in Psychology, because I'm interested in the mind. How the mind works, that's what you got to know. Not what it says in a book. I can look at anybody and say what they thinking. Because I know how they mind works.

"You think you know what's going to happen, but you don't. Nobody can say what's going to happen in the future. I'm an alcoholic, and I'm going to get up tomorrow and have a drink. That's certain. But you can't predict I'm going to take a drink. What if I get killed? Then I won't be here to take a drink! See what I mean?

"Astral travel. That's the future. With astral travel, you can be in the future. You can see what's happening. Astral travel, man. That's where it's at. Not in any book."